Fostering Lillian'isms

So for those of you who have read on here or on facebook about some of the things Lillian says you know that I have coined them "Lillian'isms" and they are often hilarious and sometimes insightful. I was curious to see what Lillian would think about sharing and becoming a big sister to sibling(s) who may end up being transient in nature.

We were only probably a week into our decision of pursuing fostering when the perfect opportunity presented itself to talk with Lillian and I couldn't pass it up. I'll try my best to describe it below, it brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it.

L: Mom Kate at school doesn't have a Dad, he died, I mean well no he didn't die her cat died but she doesn't get to see her Dad.

M: Wow, that is sad isn't it.

L: yeah because she doesn't get to see her dad or her cat

M: it's good that Kates mommy is so nice huh?

L: yeah

M: did you know that some kids don't have a mommy or a daddy to take care of them?

L: who takes care of them

M: sometimes their grandma, or grandpa, or someone in their family but sometimes another family has to take care of them. Sometimes their mommy or daddy are sick or have to go away for a while and they need a nice family to live with.

L: Oh

M: what would you think if some of those kids came to live with our family for a while?

L: Oh yeah, they could live with us because some kids don't have a nice mommy or daddy and I do have the nicest mommy and daddy

M: and would you share your toys and things with them?

L: yes, and if they didn't have a toothbrush or some other stuff they need I would share mine with them or we could just go to the store and get them a toothbrush

M: that is so sweet of you, yes we could buy them things they need, you wouldn't have to share your toothbrush but you would have to share some of your other htings and even your mommy and daddy.

L: ok, can we go pick them out now?

M: *laughing* no honey it doesn't work that way we have to wait until some kids need help. these kids would be younger than you so you would be the big sister and we would all love them but then they would have to leave and we would be really sad but sometimes we might get to keep them and they would be with us forever.

L: Yeah, and maybe if their mommy and daddy die then we could keep them?

M: Um, yeah, hopefully their mommy and daddy don't die but if they do then maybe we could keep them.

L: OK

M: so how many kids do you think we should get?

L: 8

M: EIGHT are you crazy?! Your mommy would go crazy with that many kids.

L: ok 5 then 5 kids

M: where would 5 kids sleep?

L: well I will take all my books and toys off of my bed and they can sleep with me and one of them can sleep on my princess mat next to my bed

M: Oh, that is very sweet but I don't think 5 kids would fit in your room, I think we'll start with 1 or 2.

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Ok so those were the highlights of the conversation. It was SUCH an endearing conversation that I will never forget, I only wish I had known I was going to have the conversation ahead of time so I could have recorded it. There were SO many follow up conversations and snippets that were just as great. I have captured some of them below.

We hadn't really told all of our family or close acquantinces yet when it became apparent that we needed to or Lillian was going to do it for us! Lillian to Uncle Shane: "Uncle Shane new kids without moms and dads are coming to live with us". Thats a fun one to follow up on! I was just sure she was going to tell our florida family before we got around to doing it on our trip down there, luckily she had enough other things like Disney to distract her.

Once Lillian had grasped that there wasn't a baby coming from my belly but that other kids were going to come live with us and they would be her siblings she was loving the idea, there was however a bit that she didn't understand and that is that we didn't get to just 'pick' kids at random. I will never forget after she was playing with an older girl at church named Ella and after prying them apart we were leaving church. Lillian said "Mom I really like Ella, can she come live with us and be my sister" LOL I had to explain to her that Ella had a mommy and daddy to take care of her.

When our social worker Suzie came to our house Lillian kept wanting to know who she was. So, I explained to her that Mrs. Suzie is the lady that helps kids who need a family to take care of them for a while. That definitely peaked Lillian's interest who then wanted to know if we could go get the kids now! In her mind the lady that helps kids was at our house (for a home study) so it must be time to go get them. She then tried very hard to send home toys with her so that she could give them to the boys and girls.

Lillian started to understand that we were going to have to be patient and that we couldn't just 'pick' out our own kids from a store or the church congregation LOL. So she decided to formulate her 'wish list' I suppose you could call it. Just recently this winter she has decided that she wants kids that are old enough to 'play' with and I told her they had to be 0-3 but that she would be the oldest. She decided that she wants a "a 3 year old that can play and not a baby because they will cry and wake her up and she wants a girl because they are more fun but a boy will be ok too." She definitely has an opinion, no idea where she gets that from HA.


I know there are more so I will have to come back and update as I think of things.....so that, for now, are the fostering Lillian'isms.